You see, I am a major leader, but I ended up as a 1st year student! I have 30 people subordinate to my team! They all know, they see how cool I am, what an excellent leader I am! And here, in my business, as soon as I started doing something, I immediately failed! And I already have one million debts! I am afraid and I can’t say anything to my husband, because he doesn’t see the whole situation, and he doesn’t want to get involved in it all.
It seems that her whole body is just screaming, but her voice remains absolutely calm, albeit tense.
A thought arises in my head, which is repeated many times in our coaching courses: “Every time we argue with reality, we fail. But only one hundred percent of the time. “
“Yes, I understand,” I say aloud, and continue to write down notes for my client.
In front of me sits a very beautiful woman with well-cared hands, correct facial features, she is beautifully dressed, and behind her is the interior of the kitchen in a very calm style. But her face is now absolutely restless. For several months now she has been unable to sleep, she cannot be productive at work, she is very worried about the fact that she has invested in the business, and the business does not give her income, in the amount in which she would like to receive it.
What else? I ask softly, leaving a pause so that she can tell me her story further.
The supplier has delayed the goods, the designer has not yet made the packaging, which we talked about. The holiday season, under which this product was supposed to be released, will begin soon, but I still have nothing ready! I am absolutely powerless! I can’t do anything … I took out a loan to fight off my adventure. It seemed to me that since everything is going very well at my main job, now the team is already working calmly and without my participation, I decided that I have time to start something for my soul, something for myself. I finished my studies, took courses and started buying goods … I was so inspired by this idea that there will be something for myself, something for the soul, my own business.
I will be my own boss, I will completely control the whole process, I will be able to create a product that people will like, they will buy it. But in fact, I was faced with the fact that nothing worked out for me. I took out a loan, my husband doesn’t know about it, but we have a common budget. And now he sees that I no longer invest in it. We began to move away from each other, we began to argue periodically, and I cannot sleep, because I am constantly worried, worried.
I do not know what to do. I cannot work at work, because I think about my business, I cannot do my business, because now I don’t know what to start, where to rush, what to do …
I must say that the task of the first session is to show the client the possibilities that he has, but not give him a path along which he can go. Because the path to the first session does not fit, it is a road that takes at least 3 months to reach a certain result. My services as a coach will pay off many, many times if the person really agrees to work with me further. Therefore, I never have a task to impose my services, to force a person to make a purchase. This will always be the client’s own decision. Nevertheless, already in the strategic session, I can show a person his goal, where he wants to come, the state in which he wants to live, the income that he wants to receive, how he will feel, how his relatives will feel with him nearby and so on …
When a person is inside his problem, here and now, it is very important to show him perspectives. I continue on:
“Okay, let’s imagine with you that I have a magic pill that solves your problem here and now. What would be your ideal day scenario then? “
And we begin to plunge into the future that may be, but which is not now. On the one hand, it seems that this is some kind of illusion, but on the other hand, it may be a plan to move towards.
My client begins to secretly wipe away her tears. Only here, with me, a person can truly relax, show their true emotions, their fear, their loss, their bewilderment, their weakness without condemnation from my side … And as soon as we start talking to her about those other prospect that maybe those that lie further “behind” these problems, her face transforms, she begins to shine, fear disappears, the posture becomes more relaxed, and the person seems to be transferred from his problems to a further place where everything has already been decided. Where she from there, from the future, can look at herself today, and can help herself here and now.
We begin to discuss some small details with her, we begin to discuss how this will affect her family, how she can finally calm down in her relationship with her husband.
She loses her fear to act. And at the end of the session, she already understands exactly what steps she needs to take now in order to finally resolve her situation completely.
I went into coaching for these stories. I used to collect and admire them just for myself before. But now I see that I have a real tool and opportunity to help people, change their stories, help get out of crisis and confusion, show them perspectives, their strengths, pay attention to it, help making plans and start acting.
I myself am inspired by the first free sessions … Because, seeing what miracles happen in the free version, I am amazed how far we can go with the client in paid sessions. Three months of work can completely and radically change a person, they can give him his legendary life.
Now coaching is with me all the time. Every story I hear, I consider, I check the facts, I see emotion, and I see behind the words. This is an amazing feeling! Sometimes I feel like I hacked into the matrix of life.
Stay connected, I will continue to share my stories with you. It is very interesting.
All matches with real characters are random.
Author Anastasiia Davletshina